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Things you'd never want to hear in movie trailers...
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The Third M?n
Studio Exec


Joined: 09 Sep 2003
Posts: 575
Location: Chasing Stef around post-war Vienna

PostPosted: 09.15.2003 12:34 pm    Post subject: Things you'd never want to hear in movie trailers... Reply with quote

Here are some:

"To save the world, they must..."

"Vin Diesel in... xXx... 2:Shoot 'n' smoke. Coming to a theater near you... SOON!"

"Jennifer Lopez in her directorial debut..."

"MTV Pictures presents..."

"It's the ultimate action movie!"

"When you thought it was all over..."

"They're BACK!"

Post your own and make me laugh.
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the night watchman
Studio Exec


Joined: 27 Jun 2003
Posts: 1373
Location: Dark, run-down shack by the graveyard.

PostPosted: 09.15.2003 1:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

"A film by Michael Bay."
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Danny Baldwin
Studio Exec


Joined: 26 Jun 2003
Posts: 1354
Location: San Diego, CA

PostPosted: 09.15.2003 1:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Night Watchman, that's only half the battle.

"A film by Michael Bay

Starring.......Person......

In a Jery Bruckheimer Production"
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The Third M?n
Studio Exec


Joined: 09 Sep 2003
Posts: 575
Location: Chasing Stef around post-war Vienna

PostPosted: 09.15.2003 3:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Baldwin, that's only a quarter of the battle. Cool

"A film written, co-produced, photographed and directed by Michael Bay... starring Ben Affleck, Chris Rock, Rob Schneider and Tom Green... produced by money-making' blockbusterin' legendary producer Jerry Bruckheimer...

ARMAGEDDON 2

Coming soon...

...to a theater near you!"

Hearing that would literally make me puke in nine different colors. I kid you not.
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the night watchman
Studio Exec


Joined: 27 Jun 2003
Posts: 1373
Location: Dark, run-down shack by the graveyard.

PostPosted: 09.15.2003 4:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah, Bruckheimer and Bay is a conjunction of the most dire evil, all right.
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"If you're talking about censorship, and what things should be shown and what things shouldn't be shown, I've said that as an artist you have no social responsibility whatsoever."

-David Cronenberg
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juhsstin
Camera Operator


Joined: 07 Jul 2003
Posts: 87

PostPosted: 09.15.2003 8:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

well bad boys 2 was actually quite good imho, at least as far as action, comedy, and overall fun value goes. amazingly i found myself to never be too bored for too long a period of time while watching this.

armageddon 2, on the other hand, well let's just say that that would be the DUMBEST idea possible... Rolling Eyes
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The Third M?n
Studio Exec


Joined: 09 Sep 2003
Posts: 575
Location: Chasing Stef around post-war Vienna

PostPosted: 09.16.2003 4:29 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

the night watchman wrote:
Yeah, Bruckheimer and Bay is a conjunction of the most dire evil, all right.


The Sum of all Fears, basically.
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the night watchman
Studio Exec


Joined: 27 Jun 2003
Posts: 1373
Location: Dark, run-down shack by the graveyard.

PostPosted: 09.16.2003 9:03 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

While we're bashing the unholy duo, try this on for size:



Jery Bruckheimer presents

A film by Michael Bay

Martin Lawrence in

The Maltese Falcon



Makes my blood turn to ice, it does.
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"If you're talking about censorship, and what things should be shown and what things shouldn't be shown, I've said that as an artist you have no social responsibility whatsoever."

-David Cronenberg
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matt header
Studio Exec


Joined: 26 Jun 2003
Posts: 623
Location: Milwaukee, WI

PostPosted: 09.16.2003 9:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The stuff that nightmares are made of.
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Mark Dujsik
Director


Joined: 26 Jun 2003
Posts: 212
Location: Chicago, IL

PostPosted: 09.16.2003 10:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

In my current mood:

"From the director of Cabin Fever..."
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10 Best Films of 2006



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The Third M?n
Studio Exec


Joined: 09 Sep 2003
Posts: 575
Location: Chasing Stef around post-war Vienna

PostPosted: 09.17.2003 7:24 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Mark Dujsik wrote:
In my current mood:

"From the director of Cabin Fever..."


...comes a sci-fi adventure you'll never forget...

ATTACK OF THE PANCAKES!!!
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Danny Baldwin
Studio Exec


Joined: 26 Jun 2003
Posts: 1354
Location: San Diego, CA

PostPosted: 10.07.2003 1:45 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

"Based on the hit video game which blew Play Station 2 users away, everywhere..."
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the night watchman
Studio Exec


Joined: 27 Jun 2003
Posts: 1373
Location: Dark, run-down shack by the graveyard.

PostPosted: 10.07.2003 7:10 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

At this point -- House of the Dead. Zombies and bullet-time. Right. Rolling Eyes
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"If you're talking about censorship, and what things should be shown and what things shouldn't be shown, I've said that as an artist you have no social responsibility whatsoever."

-David Cronenberg
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The Dentist
Grip


Joined: 09 Oct 2003
Posts: 9
Location: Melbourne

PostPosted: 10.09.2003 9:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

'A delightful romantic comedy starring Hugh Grant...'

'From xxxxx pictures comes the latest adaptation of the Jane Austen novel...'
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Dr Giggles
Camera Operator


Joined: 09 Oct 2003
Posts: 84

PostPosted: 10.09.2003 11:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

"just when you thought you were safe"
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walking on air, up from the wheelchair,

I'll find the suicide, that I deserve.
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