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My Crapola Poems

 
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How much do these suck?
Really bad
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
Pretty bad
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
Extremely bad
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
Worst bunch of crapola you ever read
100%
 100%  [ 1 ]
They're actually ok
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
Total Votes : 1

Author Message
The Cipster
Grip


Joined: 18 Jan 2004
Posts: 1

PostPosted: 01.18.2004 7:07 pm    Post subject: My Crapola Poems Reply with quote

Ok, here are some poems, they're probably no good, and my friend is conning me into putting them on this site be telling me they're "genius" and I'm just going along for the heck of it.

Sooooooooo, tell me what you think if you care to.



-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Toads and Roads

Has the road ever wondered why the travelers ne?er return?

Will a toad ever remember the bright light of the sun?

How can a man run when he has nothing to run from?

What is the end of the road?



The Flower

How can a flower hold such beauty

The sun bites down with its bitter breath

Yet each day for years it arises with splendor

And yet in the end it perishes and is ravished by death

The struggle it endures to give peace to the earth

Wrath and destruction surrounds its existence

It shines with love and balance forever

Until in the end, only we can reminisce.



Forests and Quarries

What wonders are found in the forests

Peace, harmony, tranquility

A forest is the epitome of balance in nature

None shall e?er destroy a forest?s invincibility

A quarry?s depths are of cold, hard stone

Stoic, emotionless, withered

Nothing is lost in a quarry, but nothing is found

Void of emotions, a heartless empire

Though beauty can be found in either form

A demon is the quarry?s mold

And an angel is the forest?s

Is there a beast or angel inside your soul?
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matt header
Studio Exec


Joined: 26 Jun 2003
Posts: 623
Location: Milwaukee, WI

PostPosted: 01.18.2004 10:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Cipster,

Thanks for showing us your works! I'm a huge fan of poetry in general, and I wouldn't say that any of these three suck in the least. You have a very environmentalist viewpoint, which comes across strongly - so while I wouldn't say that "wrath and destruction surround" a flower's existence (surely there's beauty and growth to be found in the manmade world?) your poems are effective and convincing nonetheless. I enjoyed "Toads and Roads" the most; it's short and somewhat mystical, simply structured but impressively thought-provoking. There could be some more balance, perhaps - a viewpoint that doesn't weigh nature vs. man in such a black and white manner - but still, quite good.
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the night watchman
Studio Exec


Joined: 27 Jun 2003
Posts: 1373
Location: Dark, run-down shack by the graveyard.

PostPosted: 01.21.2004 12:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Definitey not the worst bunch of crapola I've ever read; in fact, like Matt, I rather liked "Toads and Roads" (save for the title ... sorry). There other two aren't bad, but a tad bit too schematic and polerized for me. Also like Matt, I agree that beauty can be found in the man-made world, because, after all, Man is of nature, isn't he?
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the night watchman
Studio Exec


Joined: 27 Jun 2003
Posts: 1373
Location: Dark, run-down shack by the graveyard.

PostPosted: 01.21.2004 2:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

By the way, Cipster, why did you -- or your friend, rather -- choose to post them on this site? I ask only because you haven't posted anything else.
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